Leah Bowshier, Copy Editor
The stigma that counseling is a sign of weakness or is only for people in the midst of an emotional crisis pushes students away from a helpful and readily available campus resource. Instead of jumping to conclusions about the purpose of the Center for Counseling, students should consider the basis for their hasty judgments.
When asked about the stigma surrounding counseling, Kevin Bellew, the associate dean of wholeness and wellness, said that he has seen a decrease during his seven years at Asbury but explained there is still a negative perception to confront. He acknowledged the stigma surrounding mental illness in general and the tendency for people to associate counseling solely with mental illness.
“Most of the students who come [to the counseling center] are not in that situation of harming themselves or others,” said Bellew. “A lot of students are here because relationships aren’t going the way they want, they are really lonely, they are overwhelmed or they have overcommitted.”
“The other piece [of the stigma] is that we don’t like to recognize that something might be wrong,” said Bellew. He noted that students often hear messages from some Christian communities that a strong enough faith in Jesus will solve one’s mental and emotional problems.
Bellew, however, disagrees: “I think it’s very unproductive that we promote a false narrative that says, ‘If I have Jesus, everything is going to be okay.’” This view often discourages people from reaching out for help and can be harmful for those who choose not to talk about what they are experiencing.
“In this kind of religious setting, it’s harder to admit there’s something not right in my life,” said Bellew.
That notion is something junior Teri Crutcher can relate to. Crutcher’s positive experience with counseling came after initially resisting the suggestion to use the services. She said, “I thought it was for people who had ‘serious problems,’ and I … thought I didn’t need therapy.”
Crutcher continued, “I didn’t want to talk to anyone about my problems because I didn’t think they were problems.” She explained that since she got past that mindset, she has been surprised by how helpful counseling has been for her.
Stigma exists surrounding counseling in general, but Bellew noted that the stigma can be even stronger for men. Bellew said, “[Men] are less inclined to do it because of how they are socialized. ‘Don’t feel; shut it off; be tough’ — that’s the socialization men get. So when they do enter into counseling, they are often very disconnected from their feelings, and they are not using those, and that repressing comes out as anger because that’s the only thing that men are allowed to feel.”
According to Bellew, 78% of this semester’s counseling sessions have been with female students, while only 22% have been with male students. This statistic shows that men are underrepresented in counseling even when considering the university’s nearly 60% female, 40% male ratio in the student population.
Senior Josh Magee also acknowledged this stigma for men in counseling. Looking at his own experience, he said, “Our generation is starting to come out of this, but [men] are still kind of in that headstrong space of, ‘I’ve got to figure it out for me because I am weak if I don’t figure it out for me.’”
This semester, the Center for Counseling has started several student wellness groups in an effort to provide a different kind of support. In these settings, students benefit from working with a counselor but also hearing from others who are going through similar experiences. All of the groups listed in the graphic, except for the emotional grit group, are still open to anyone who is interested.
Bellew emphasized that counseling can be helpful for students as part of their support system. “Friends, natural supports, are incredible,” he said. “That’s a part of just healthy living — having a roommate, a friend, a mentor, a pastor, a parent, a family member, a sibling that we can talk to about what’s going on in our lives.”
For Bellew, counseling should ultimately help “transition [students] when they leave here to natural supports in their community so they’re supported in that way.”
While counseling is not necessary for every person, it should be recognized as a possible step toward working through emotional difficulties or increasing self-awareness.
Magee suggested that students enter with realistic goals for the counseling sessions: “Go in expecting to learn about yourself, not to fix yourself.”
