“I just do not get along with overly competitive people.” “People who dominate the conversation just really get on my nerves.” “People will do anything to avoid conflict. I can’t stand it!” We all can identify behaviors that get on our nerves, and that is why I value the Enneagram. The Enneagram can help you understand why people do what they do, and with that understanding comes compassion and mercy. These behaviors are no longer a thing to avoid in friendships but something you can look at and see the deeper motivation behind.
For example, I used to work with a girl who corrected me constantly. When I talked to clients she would contradict me, which embarrassed me and made me seem inept. I originally figured she was vying for my position. When I found out that she was a Type One, I understood that her corrections were not motivated by malice and ambition but by a deep desire for correctness. I do not value being right in the same intrinsic way she does, but knowing her Enneagram type helped me to see why she does these things. Of course, I did not immediately stop rolling my eyes at her corrections and become completely okay with it. However, after a few weeks of reminding myself of why she was doing it, I became much more patient and sympathetic with her.
As a Type Two, I think the emphasis of empathy in the Enneagram is its greatest feature. Isn’t empathy the whole goal of the liberal arts education emphasized at Asbury? Various mindsets and perspectives unified through science and experience, evidence and narrative. The Enneagram, if utilized correctly, can be an extension of Asbury’s liberal arts mindset.
The Enneagram, however, is not just for understanding others but also yourself. Part of the wonders of this personality test are that it exposes your unknown desires. By pinpointing these motivations for your basic behaviors, it can lay bare your deepest sins. The Enneagram test doesn’t know that you struggle with gambling or gossiping, but it will explain the core of those struggles. Instead of treating the symptoms of your sin issue, you can get to the root of yourself and further seek God to become more like Him.
Some people argue that tests like the Enneagram have drawbacks because of the potential to excuse behavior as “just the way you are.” I will admit that there is a tendency to use its behavioral explanations to avoid changing. A Type Seven may use the Enneagram as a way to justify reckless and shallow behavior. If someone points out their potentially destructive habits, they may cite their “enthusiast” label and brush off justified warnings.
However, acknowledging your greatest weakness can also be your greatest asset. Type Nines are known as the Peacemaker. The danger of their type is avoiding conflict at all costs in pursuit of a perceived peaceful atmosphere. But when Type Nines acknowledge this tendency, they can become vital tools for reconciliation in their community. At their healthiest, Nines can sense tension and help people address it in a productive way.
Ultimately, the benefits far outweigh the drawbacks or possible risks involved in the Enneagram. This is especially true when it comes to building a diverse Christian community like the one we strive to facilitate here at Asbury.
