The HICCUP lied to us.
It’s day 21. All I want is pumpkin spice.
The world seems to be moving in slow motion, and I see more outsiders with pumpkin spice lattes. Is it true? Are they real? Fall decorations mean nothing to me. I can’t stare at a pumpkin without wanting to scream and punch it.
A friend and I followed up with the HICCUP the other day, and apparently, fall drinks will be reintroduced on Oct. 1.
Now, I’ve already discussed that I believe pumpkin spice products should be allowed at any time because of the free country that we live in, but to wait until October is absolutely where I draw the line.
In October, fall is basically over. I am usually, at that time, sitting with Justin Bieber’s Christmas album serenading my ears. Before Halloween, I am already thinking about how I’ll be hopelessly single for another holiday. It prompts the question of what chestnuts are and why they’re roasting over an open fire. It makes me refrain from being a person that adheres the felt reindeer antlers to their car (it’s an annual battle).
With this seasonal offset of Pumpkin Spice neglect, I guess I’ll have to push my schedule back. You have won HICCUP. I can’t produce nearly as much holly jolly energy this holiday as I’d like to without the October pregaming.
Not only have you taken away my autumn joy, but you have now ruined Christmas. Can I at least get hot chocolate early? Oh wait, that drink is available year-round.
