Nothing ever happens in Wilmore, right?
This may seem true, but I have heard enough stories, seen enough numbers, and witnessed enough instances to know that Wilmore (and even Asbury’s campus) is not perfectly safe.
Even at Asbury, where it is easy to feel safe, we, especially women, must still be vigilant to protect ourselves. It is important to use common sense and not put yourself in a position that could potentially become dangerous.
Know that it is OK to trust your instincts. If there is a guy that makes you uncomfortable, listen to that instinct. It may not mean anything, but it could. Prior to his arrest for solicitation of kidnapping, Jonathan Mitchem made several girls on campus feel uneasy. It is OK to turn a guy down if he asks for your number or wants to hang out.
Do not let your friends make you feel guilty for feeling uncomfortable around someone. While your friends may see him as a nice guy (and he might be), you have every right to avoid situations that make you feel uncomfortable. Don’t feel obligated to stick around if he shows up or is invited by someone else to join your group. Likewise, respect the feelings of your friends, and do not force them into a situation that makes them uncomfortable.
One of the most important ways to protect yourself is to be aware of your surroundings. Is someone following you? Is someone acting in an unusual way? Do not be so absorbed in your phone (or anything else) that you do not notice what is going on around you. If you call campus security, they will be more than happy to escort you back to your dorm if you are in a situation that makes you nervous (or if it is just too dark to walk across campus by yourself).
If you are going on a date with a guy you do not know well, suggest making it a double date, or driving yourself if you have a car. It is a great idea to get to know guys in a group setting. Do not just assume someone is safe just because they seem nice (or are a friend of a friend). Get to know them first.
If someone is approaching you, you can take a picture on your phone and send it to a friend along with your location. The new Campus Shield app has an option to allow you to share your location with friends. You can also use your phone to make it seem like you are talking with a friend or relative. One time, my friend and I were being followed by a guy after dark. My friend pulled out her phone and pretended that she was talking to her father, telling “him” how we were on our way to meet him.
A martial arts instructor told me that our voice is 99.9% of our self-defense. If someone is threatening you, call for help. They will not want attention drawn to the situation, and shouting will often be enough to make them back off. It may also bring someone else to the scene to help you. Even if the situation does not seem extreme enough to warrant a call for help, speaking in a loud voice or calling out to a suspicious individual can have a similar effect.
If you see someone else in a situation that seems dangerous, please do not stand by without doing anything. The bystander effect causes people to assume that someone else will help a person, but if everyone takes this view, no one will actually help them. If it is safe to do so, you can personally step in to help (for example, by acting like you know the person in danger and giving them a way out of the situation). If not, then you can call security or leave a tip with the Campus Shield app.
It is also important for women to know that it is OK (in fact, good) to report if someone harms them or tries to. Do not feel like you must protect the person; it is more important to protect any potential future victims. There are plenty of ways to report things on campus privately.
These protocols and procedures will help make the campus safer. If someone harms you, chances are you will not be the only one and that they will do the same thing, or worse, to others. Additionally, Asbury has resources to help you cope with the situation (such as the counseling center). Know that you are not alone and that it was not your fault.
